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You're in the Dugout Now
Written by Ed Grimes
For the 1999 G&G Sports - Shadow Knights
I don't know, but I've been
told
That the Men in Black have hearts of gold
I was trying to take a bath
When my Mom signed me up for the draft
G&G Sports picked my name
Life's never gonna be the same
They stuck a bat in my hand
Sent me to war in a field of sand
Greco put my name on a board
I was in the line up, I'm gonna get floored
The enemy threw rock at me
I had to duck and take a pee
Grimes wanted a suicide squeeze
He's nut, and I ran for the trees
Our camp was small with just one bench
Not much better than a trench
Met other recruits, just like me
Noah, Dominic and Bobby
They told me of a kid named Russ
Could throw a rock as fast as a bus
A buzz cut was given to Michael B
They wanted more and found Airey
They made Brandon wear some pads
He looked better than his Dad
David Lew found the line
No way we'd leave him behind
Eric and Jason were in our squad
They hustled and worked real hard
Robey was our newest guy
Tough as nails, never say die
CJ got a rock too high
Smacked it good and broke Grimes thigh
O'Donnell was a very good sport
We felt bad when we broke his fort
The generals called Scharf by phone
Sorry Jonathan, time to go home
Albert thought his team could hit
Beat him good, he had a fit
Calvano yells like a mutt
Got in our way, kicked his butt
I learned how to play and to fight
Which shirt to wear, I never got right
I'm gonna write my mom a letter
This army thing has gotten better
I had a great time with my friends
I think I'll enlist again.
Return to Grimes' Baseball Tales
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